Love Conquers All :)

I know am writing after a long time... and it had to be a news of this magnitude to make me connected to the world. I am down with food poisoning. I am drinking electrol (yuck raised to infinity!). And this is by far the first post on my newest, sexy (an adjective used by my Mum for my newest gadget) laptop :D

I've been low for the past 3-4 days on account of food poisoning, and am sipping my electrol... pretending it to be champagne :D as I write this post.

Diwali Weekend

It's been long since I've been here. But the last couple of days have been quite stressful and great, too.

I know, that's a contradiction right there, but then, this isn't the first time you'll be reading that in the face of adversity lies a great challenge - and opportunity to find your self. Like they say, you find out what you're made of.

Is compassion weakness?
Does a curse given from beneath the skin of one's soul really work?
Is there someone with a higher equity up there?

I want to write a story about a mad man.

If you're somewhere, alone and tied in bed, for a reason, then you might want to read articles about hacking a website, or the Spanish Inquisition or watch some movies, like 'Reversal of Fortune', 'The Englishman Who Went Up A Hill But Came Down A Mountain' and listen to Ennio Morricone's fabulous soundtracks, live orchestra on youtube.

Happy Diwali.

Goodwill

There's something with me and mid-week. I am so upbeat during the week-days. And recently some survey said that people dreaded Tuesdays more than Monday. Well, surely they hadn't included me in their statistics.

I had an awesome time on a rainy Tuesday night at the outstretched piece of land and tetra pods at Nariman Point. At 09: 30 PM, there was no one else, but me, my Dad and a sea that was kissed by some heavy rain. It was alive, all right, and listening intently to our conversation. We'd just come back from Oxford, Churchgate, and there, we read a little about Peter Drucker's philosophy. He'd said that every six months entrepreneurs needed to ask themselves what they wanted to be remembered for. Dad and I, were discussing the same thing.

There's so much to do in this world, and it suddenly struck me that one lifetime could simply never be enough. It is a simple thought, yes, and thankfully it keeps hitting me more often than not. To me, the thought is an important reminder because often I wonder about the purpose of life, existence, good and evil and the choice we seem to have. I'd like to think that when such thoughts bombard me, and suicide really seems like the perfect answer, my destiny would say, "There she goes again!" :)

One important lesson I learnt was that goodwill is an important thing. And that makes me smile. I believe that creating goodwill in a business in the current economy, and at a time when trust of people especially when it comes to parting with their money, is at an all-time-low, is a very very tough task. My Dad creates goodwill with a great ease. How he does this, I am not sure.

In fact, I criticise him a lot about being "soft" to people and being from the law school, I believe in documenting or contracting even a single sneeze of my client on a stamp paper, duly notorised and entering into a contract before even breathing with that person. Having said that, I'd like to mention that I find pre-nupital agreements strange. Seeing my Dad, I realise I do have a lot to learn. Dad never went to a business school.

Movie Review: 'ROBOT'

Finally. Special thanks to everyone who made the movie such a "must-watch". 
But here's a list of special thanks I'm compelled to convey:


Swanand Kirkire - Dialogues & Lyrics. The man translated "sperms" into Hindi. I can't just remember what it's called for the life of me. And I don't even want to google it. Paagal anukaran. Incidentally, that also sums up the gist of this entire review I am about to write: Mad Robot.


Manish Malhotra - Costume Designer. I think it's no ordinary feat to make any girl in the world look like Rakhi Sawant. He managed to make Aishwarya Rai look like her. Through the silk gowns, one could still see the "tyre" around her tummy as she monotonously gyrated in the deserts and some animals in South America. But your costumes successfully hid the huge paunch of Superstar Rajnikanth. Bravo. 


Jasmine. - Friend. Best Friend. Thank you, Jas Sparrow, for once again reminding me that PG Wodehouse and Shankar (Director of the film) are doing a service to depression prone maniacs like us: making us laugh continuously for over 3 hours is not a small thing. At any point you want to watch this film again, I want you to know, I am waiting for your call. Always.


Okay, going forward with the review I have decided to write come what may.


First of all, this is the second time it has happened with me that I retain the same look at the first scene of the film, and even at the last one. It first happened with 'DELHI 6'. My look that time was: "What's this? Where am I? What's happening?!" 


In 'ROBOT' it  was simpler: "Ha ha ha ha" -- as I saw a robot, apparently walking right out of that recent Panasonic commercial, that was the first scene... or may be it was from that IBM commercial where robots are serving tea-coffee in an IBM office. Jesus, it just proves that Indian Directors was being "inspired" even while surfing TV. 


I've never laughed so much before. Rohit Shetty and his Golmaal films have serious competition.


Anyway, here's the list of films Robot is accused of copying:
Matrix
Terminator
I, Robot
SpiderMan
Pirates of the Caribbean
some robot commercials
some "All-out" and other mosquito repellent commercials


Please note that the list is definitely not exhaustive.


Okay, cut to the chase. After the first 4 minutes, I decided to change my seat. The man sitting next to me was a South Indian. And as we all know, SuperStar Rajnikanth is a god down South. I didn't want him to beat me up, lest I offend him by breaking into a laughter in a "serious" scene. 


I wonder why SuperStar Scientist Rajnikanth was making the Robot. The robots were actually serving tea and coffee around him anyway. Could it be that he blotted reality for over 10 years and started disregarding the daily and obvious nuances around him? And can I get a job like him? A scientist who gets served tea and coffee by cute robots and is paid well enough to drive a Mercedes? His boss, the villain, drove an Audi, by the way.


So back to the story. SuperStar Scientist Rajnikanth makes a Robot intending to serve the nation and replace soldiers. Here's the technical specification of Robot:


1 Robot = 100 male species of human beings


But it is rejected by the Jealous Boss, whose approval is essential somehow for the army guys to have it. Jealous Boss says it is a mindless machine. A general can command the Robot to kill another general. He knew what it is to live in a country with Hindu-Muslim issues. So SuperStar Scientist Rajnikanth decides to inject feelings and human emotions inside the Robot. He also injects LOVE. Love has made a fool out of many a human beings, what the hell is a robot going to do about it... Anyway, the plot thickens.. 


If you look at it, the trouble started when Rai starts PDA - Public Display of Affection - by regularly hugging and kissing the Robot. So the Robot grows a .. [edited text] .. and gets [edited text]... Read, falls in love.


Somewhere down the line, the competition for Rai's affections is sparked between our SuperStar Scientist and Robot. It ends somewhere when the Robot asks Aishwarya why she prefers the Scientist. "Is it because of sex???" Can't believe he actually asked that. She replies, "Sheeeesh."


The Scientist takes the Robot for a display to the Army, finally. The Robot puts a rose on top of a grenade. Suggesting mankind to fall in love with Rai. 


The Scientist dismantles his creation, in fury, and dumps it in the dumping grounds of Chennai. Jealous Boss retrieves it out of there and lets all hell lose. 


By the way, in order to impress Aishwarya, the Robot actually promises to get the same mosquito to apologise to her, who'd bitten her. Believe it. My oh my, the Robot can also speak mosquitoish. The bold mosquito**** tells the Robot it would apologise on the fulfillment of three conditions (and am laughing while writing this).. two of them were, it wants to taste AB Negative Blood since it is very "yummy" and the second was that Robot had to stop companies manufacturing mosquito repellent stuff.


****Proof of Boldness of Mosquito:
Rajnikanth: "Who was it among you, who bit her?"
Bold Mosquito: "Yeah yeah, it was me, what will you do? I have even bitten the Chief Minister!"


But this was the sweet Robot, before being "polluted" by Rai. The cold Robot is the one who goes on a destruction rampage, thanks to the insertion of a chip that looked like a red simcard, by the Jealous Boss. Now, the evil Robot has one and only one purpose. I'll translate that in English: make love to Aishwarya and have pseudo robo-sapiens. God knows if that Jealous Boss was sadistic or what.


He clones, he fights, he manufactures robot sperms. He is all, all is him. And as he fires the entire Chennai city cops, he says one dialogue. Two words: "Happy Diwali". The background score breaks into a robotic/ robosonic, "two point oh... two point oh..." The SuperStar Scientist sure has lot's to do, before robo-sapiens are born and start calling Aishwarya, "Amma" in the same robotic/ robosonic tone.


Special thanks to A R Rahman for the noisy score which drowned my echoes of laughter and claps.

Paintings of Leonid Afremov

A Beautiful Wednesday

Sometimes life just brings the best - all that can happen to you and even inside of you. It's like meeting a new person inside of you.

It's like you're sitting on a table, it's an elongated birthday party - yours - and you are unwrapping presents one after the other. I wonder what happened first - falling in love with him and then life, or the other way round. But then - does it matter?

And you look at every crisis that has occurred, and every crisis that's on its way, due in a couple of days, weeks, you look at everything, how bad you can be hit, and how deep you'll fall, still you find yourself smiling in this moment. May be this is the state I've waited for all my life. To live, to love the moment. And he's not even here. Nor are the crises. And his thought, this moment will be summoned to, in that moment.

****

For the nth time, I find myself quitting the company and taking a road never traveled before. Felt awesome when my family drove down to my office to pick me up. In typical Hollywood movie style, I got my photoframe (a sexy one, bearing a still from the movie, "The Rakes" starring Micheal Caine and Jude Law), a silver, diamond studded Ganesha and a deep (sea) blue paper weight, some law books, pen-holder, and three marker pens, pencils, and sharpener in the brown box. Tucked it in the car, and drove for dinner. I really felt like celebrating my freedom and a decision that might come to be regretted, but every time I've done something that felt like this, I've thoroughly enjoyed myself, even if it's harmed me!

Whenever I came to work to town, to that picture perfect sunshine filled horizon kissing the Arabian Sea, I felt I have come back home. Today I felt like I am going to be off to conquer a new land... somewhere far from home. May be that is home. So not 'Drops of Jupiter'. 

We ate at Gaylord's, though the first choice was the Continental food joint, RELISH, suggested by Dad, of course. But no one was willing to wait a good 30 minutes before we got a seat. Plus, that joint is always noisy, even in mid-week. So we walked to Gaylord's. Dad insisted the ambiance and so we moved inside, instead of the more comfortable open air section. I was carrying my lively- pink shawl, so I braced myself. We ate, and I felt like celebrating. I don't do dinners usually, since I am exceptionally lousy at it, but tonight, I felt like celebrating. I knew Alexander would be fixing himself something hot, and much yummier (he's an awesome cook). A couple of sneezes later, I enjoyed my chicken, and Goan Prawn Curry, along with some piping hot biryani. I could have even ordered Champagne tonight - only deal was that somebody had to drive a good 30 kms back home. I was enjoying a dinner. And the thought of telling it to Alexander (that I made it through it, and I had chicken!!!) made it more enjoyable.

Then we had some heated peanuts, and went to Gateway of India. There we clicked pictures. Nothing beats a nice family photo, and breaking into laughter over a joke cracked by Dad! The sea was at rest, all decorated with boats and cruise liners. I wish I could watch the sunrise someday on the west coast.

We got into the car, and since there was no traffic, the drive was particularly enjoyable. Autumn wind whispering in to your ears and kissing your face, as if it knew the secret of your smile, of your love. Got some balloons on the way, had a balloon fight with Shruti :D and that was one highlight of the evening! We later dumped those for Daku who chased them in the house. As I walked him later on, I realised that winter was setting in, a season ready to change. And so am I.

The Unromantic Me

I can't do dinners.


If am eating, then it's imperative for me to watch movies, or read something - even if it's the most boring and uninteresting account of anything. I can't eat with family or friends or anyone on the dining table, talking. I just get bored. Even with family, I get a book along for dinner. Wonder what P.G. Wodehouse would have to say about that. That's the only way I can enjoy food. In fact if I was sitting with my Mum on the dining table, it would be an awkward moment. 


When friends - especially males - say let's have dinner, I avoid it. I can't get past the starters or soup for the life of me. 


For meeting friends, or bonding over months, the best thing to do is watch movies. That's a well spent, well utilized evening to me.


The idea of having a romantic, candle-light dinner, is definitely appealing to me, as is for every girl, but... I don't think I can sail through it. The best thing for me and Alexander to do would be to watch a film, together.... finish it in, say, 6 hours or so ;)

Birthday Present

Sometimes, life just becomes beautiful. Unexpectedly.
It brings those moments that come to define you. And may be it defines life, itself.

Me and my family were leaving the theatre, and my kid sis, unexpectedly, says, "Well, Happy Birthday once again, Di," and touched my feet.

That moment was beautiful and it left me speechless. As if life suddenly opens up to you and presents you a diamond under "windfall gains" :D

Mitchell Heisman

The man who took his own life on Harvard's campus Saturday left a 1,904-page suicide note online.

According to the Harvard Crimson, Mitchell Heisman wrote "Suicide Note," posted at the suicide note, while living in an apartment near the school. The note is a "sprawling series of arguments that touch upon historical, religious and nihilist themes," his mother, Lonni Heisman, told the Crimson. She said her son would have wanted people to know about his work.

The complex note, divided into four parts, touches on Christianity, the Holocaust and social progress, among other topics, and mentions Harvard several times.

IvyGate calls the note "probing, deeply researched, and often humorous."

Heisman was 35 when he shot himself on the steps of Harvard's Memorial Church Saturday. He had a bachelor's degree in psychology from the University of Albany. According to the Crimson, he worked in area bookstores and lived on inheritance from his father, who died when he was young.

Top 5 Movie Hollywood Proposals of All Time

DISCLAIMER:
The parameter out here is where the heart is delighted without a tear in the eye. So Casblanca and Gone with the Wind fans, please do excuse me.

No one quite does it like in the movies!

Number 5:
Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl
Remember when a bejewelled Jack Sparrow tells Will Turner, as both watch Elizabeth walk away, that if he was looking for a perfect moment to tell her what he felt, well, he'd just missed it.
And we so agree.

Cut to the next scene, where Elizabeth is standing with her father, her fiance, with the rest of the crowd to watch Jack Sparrow hanged. William Turner, looks at her from afar, sighs, and approaches her. He greets the father, her fiance, and tells her that he's been in love with her for a long time. Both the father and the fiance, astonished, look at her face, searching for a response. And all she has on her face is a look of disbelief, and relief :)

Number 4:
A Good Year
This is the most under-rated movie I have ever come across. Manages to make love only an addendum to a life. When Maximillan Skinner finds himself "trapped" in a beautiful chateu in Provence, he finds something to look forward to: the fiesty restuarant manager, Fanny Chenal. He somehow manages to woo her, she even sleeps with him, only to wake up the following morning and say that she did "it" because she knew they won't have a future together. She saw through the man who Skinner was: the clever, arrogant and ruthless Londoner in Max Skinner. And when Max offers her to move to London with him and open a cafe there, she remarks, "How typical to think that am here because I have no choice."

The movie advances, and one can never forget the brooding expression Russel Crowe manages to give as he sits contemplating his boss' offer of "Money or your life".
He ends up sitting in Fanny's cafe behind a newspaper, ready to order. She walks up to the table to take the orders, and is breathless when she sees its Skinner. She maintains her self before she asks, "Vous etes pret?"
Max: "I think so."
Fanny: "You sure you don't need more time?"
Max: "No. I know what I want."
Fanny: "You're sure?"
Max: "Absolutely."
Fanny: "So. What's it going to be?"
Max: "How's the Soup?"
Fanny: "The Soup is finished."
Max: "Like my job... the Fish?"
Fanny: "We've run out."
Max: "That's like me with excuses."
Fanny: "Don't waste my time. Order something we have."
Max: "I'd like a lifetime spent with an irrational and suspicious goddess, some short-tempered jealousy on the side and a bottle of wine, that tastes like you, a glass that's never empty."
Marc Streitenfeld's music makes for an excellent accompaniment along with the story, originally written by Peter Mayle for a book.

Number 3:
50 First Dates
It requires a madness element, to do what Henry did for Lucy. This is one movie that made first-time-meeting(s) more interesting and lovable than the actual proposal(s) and kiss(es) :) The movie is excellently designed for women, who go ga-ga over the mush-quotient here and the typical, slapstick and funny remarks that men will completely identify with and enjoy. Henry's various attempts of meeting Lucy, getting to introduce himself to her is particularly awesome.

The first time proposal is also the most awkward moment in the film:
[Lucy, Henry, Lucy's father and her brother, together in a car, driving to the hospital]
Lucy: "Do I have a Boyfriend?"
Her Father: "Err Honey.. you two are sort of seeing each other." -- (pointing towards Henry)
Henry to Lucy: "I am sorry am not that good looking."
Lucy: "Did we have sex?"
At this point both the Father and Brother, turn around and stare at Henry.
Henry: "No, no we didn't. I mean we want to, very much- just kidding. Just so that everyone out here knows."

Number 2:
Jerry Maguire
This movie could easily top any woman's all time favourite on-screen love stories. And the high point is, of course, the proposal-- which happens well after marriage, and a near divorce - to the same couple. Jerry Maguire's character was very well crafted by Writer-Director Cameron Crowe, and it got a Best Supporting Actor Oscar to Cuba Goodig Jr., who portrayed the tantrum-throwing eccentric rugby player, Rod Tidwell, who wants Jerry Maguire to "show him the money". . After realising his love for Dorothy Boyd, Jerry Maguire catches a flight, rushes home, to deliver one of the most compelling love speeches of all time, "You complete me." Dororthy Boyd is sitting with her sister's friends (all divorcees), in her living room, all bitter, and noisy, complaining about how men and life have been unfair to them.
Maguire appears, all enlightened, and with a porch full of bitter women separating him from his soon-to-be-ex-wife, he breaks into a long speech: "Hello. I am looking for my wife. Okay.. if this is where it has to happen, then this is where it has to happen. I am not letting you get rid of me. How about that? This used to be my speciality. I was good in the living room. Send me in there, and I'll do it all alone. Now I just don't know... But our little company had a really good night tonight. A really big night. But it wasn't complete. It wasn't nearly close to being in the same vicinity as complete... Because I couldn't share it with you. I couldn't hear your voice, or laugh about it with you. I missed my wife. We live in a cynical world and we work in the business of tough competitors, I love you. I love you. You complete me. I just-"
Dororthy Boyd: "Shut up, just shut up.... you had me at a hello."
:)

Number 1:
My Best Friend's Wedding
Two strangers on a busy station. Boy sees girl. Shouts across the distance, "Will you marry me?"
The girl: "Yes!"
Beat that!

India does it again

The verdict is out: The Ayodhya land is indeed the janmabhoomi of Lord Ram. The Court affirmed this, in light of the report submitted by the Archealogical Survey of India (ASI) which stated that the mosque was indeed built on a "massive Hindu structure" originally built in the tenth century.
The report's credibility is not questioned.
Also, the court has agreed to the fact that the Hindu idols were "forcibly" placed within the mosque in 1992.

The Sunni Waqf Board (Muslim Party) is definitely going to appeal against this order in the Supreme Court. The Hindu Parties are going to appeal too. They are saying, if the Court has already accepted the fact that Lord Ram was indeed born here, then why give the 1/3 rd area to the Muslims?

Experts are wondering if the Court is actually saying that it was alright for the radical Hindus to demolish the mosque structure way back in 1992?

Also, the court affirmed the legal rights of a diety. Thus a "Lord" (equivalent to god in India!!!) could still fight a case, since he/ she enjoys legal rights. And so even this case was fought by a diety, Rama Lala. But since he is treated as a god, isn't he supposed to be mitigate issues of others?

The leading newspaper of the nation, carried the headline, "2:1- Hindus: Muslims". I wonder if this is a sensitive headline in times like these. The case was all about the test of India's secularism and tolerance in time, rather than a property suit.

People are ready to move on; only if our politicians decided to do the same, the case will be closed.

Ayodhya Verdict Analysed

Why Women Dislike Ram

It is a well known fact (of a myth?) that Lord Ram, after rescuing his wife, Sita, from the clutches of the evil demon Ravana, returned to India.

The tale could have had a happy ending if it wasn't for yet another twist. While taking a usual tour of his kingdom, a disguised Lord Ram, overheard a laundry man speaking to his wife, "I cannot accept you now... am not Lord ram accepts his wife who stayed with Ravana for so many days.... and nights..." This made Lord Ram reconsider his "love" for Sita. Disturbed, he mentioned his thoughts to her, and stunned, all Sita could do was say, with her hands folded, looking towards heaven, "Oh, Mother Earth, if I am pure of the heart and the body, then take me witin you." And in a moment, the Earth swallowed her.

Men might "understand" Ram's dillemma. But women cannot really overlook this particular characteristic trait of the most ideal man.

Stuck in a Timeline - The Ayodhya Dispute

When I heard that the Ayodhya battle was still raging on, I thought, you've got to be kidding me. True, India's most controversial communal battle point disturbed a lot of people back in 1992, just a year before the 1993 bomb-blasts and riots and curfew decorated even the most civilised and modern cities in India like Delhi and Mumbai. But that was 18 years ago. Surely, some solution would have come out of it. Or may be not. After all these years, I found the newspapers talking about a day of closure because the Allahabad High Court - not even the Supreme Court - was due to give a verdict as to whether there will be a temple or a mosque constructed at the Babri Masjid demolished site. My Mum says make a school for the kids and make all the politicians who have polticised the issue stand in a line and shoot them. Of course, that is the favourite political response of any conscientious Indian.

If you think 18 years is a long time, think again. You'll be surprised that the issue doesn't date back to 1992, or 1990 or 1949. It dates back to the 10th Century.

I thought communalism was a parting gift by the British to India in the 1940s. I was not entirely correct. In the 16th century, under the British Raj, a Muslim Noble, Mir Baqi, constructed the Babri Masjid (mosque) on the land that was claimed to be the birthplace of Ram (the Indian equivalent of an ideal man, of course he was the avatar of Lord Vishnu- but women will tend to disagree and here's how). Even during the British Rule, the dispute over the ownership of the land: whether it belongs to the Muslims or Hindus, raged on. This must have inspired the Bristish's "Divide-and-Rule" policy.

Interestingly, in 1949, somehow Hindu idols "appear" inside the mosque, giving a fresh claim of ownership to the Hindus, and a new form of communalism in the new Republic. The chasm between Hindus and Muslims only widened following the bloodbath that the partition entailed. Muslims alleged that these idols were "placed" within the premises. The government claimed the ownership of the land; however, they allow the puja to be performed in 1950, when Hindu worshippers insisted for offering prayers to the newly found idols in the mosque. I bet they must have argued that it was a miracle.

It was in 1961 that the first case was filed by the Sunni Wakf Board claiming ownership of the land, contending that the land was a mosque and surrounding area was a graveyard. In 1984, L K Advani, an upcoming political force of the BJP, India's premier Opposition Party, spearheaded the "regaining" temple movement. A District Judge in Allahabad in 1986 opened the premises to the Hindus. The decision was criticised by the Muslims and the matter got escalated to the Allahabad High Court. Notwithstanding the impending decision, in 1989, the then Prime Minister of India, Rajiv Gandhi, let the disputed mosque/ temple be open for a ground opening ceremony. L K Advani, who had become the President of the BJP, riding high on political fervour, undertook a controversial road trip to Ayodhya in September 1990. Series of riots broke out. He was arrested a month later.

On 6th December, 1992, the Masjid is demolished and the government led by Prime Ministed P V Narsimha Rao somehow let a "makeshift" temple "appear" at the site. This point in the Indian political history is marked by an all-time high communal tension.

Finally, in 2003, the Allahabad High Court appointed the Archealogical Survey of India (ASI) to study the excavations and submit a report as to if the temple really existed at the premises. The ASI report confirmed that a tenth century temple existed at the site where a mosque was built by Mir Baqi in 1528. Shocking. A week later the All India Muslim Personal Law Board challenged the report in the High Court.

In July 2010, the High Court gave a chance to the parties to settle their disputes, but no one came forward to talk. The Supreme Court, too, last week, intervened and deffered the judgment, asking the parties to have an out of court settlement. Without a response, however, the apex court asked the Allahabad High Court to pronounce the verdict on 30th Septemeber, 2010.

Whatever the High Court pronounces today, the decision will still be challenged before the Supreme Court. And that day, there'll be another holiday. A new generation of India, wondering what the noise and police security is all about; and after discovering the reason, they are guaranteed to be bowled over by the reason. And amidst the shock and the pessimistic streak that every Indian gets in legacy, there will be a slight tinge of shame. A country that makes use of the word secularism and democracy in the highest regards, is still grappling and politicising an issue such as this.

The world is watching, and our souls are aware too.

"Eid ka Chand" 2010

Here's some shots of the famed Eid ka Chand this year. Spotted it accidentally from the kitchen window while cooking something at a friend's place :D


My camera battery had died down on me :( hence the effect.

How to Propose a Girl

I can't believe that I am actually writing this post.

Background:
A lot of guys these days want to evaluate all the risk before asking the girl "that" question. It has always amazed me. Girls are NOT Mutual Funds.

The defense they offer is that they don't want to embarrass the girl or make her feel awkward and yak yak. The truth is they are scared. And my sympathy rests with all of them. But being in love itself is a scarier thing ;)
The most fascinating thing in love is to observe one's own self: the difference that person's call, her thoughts, the memory of her smile, etc. makes to you. It's exciting to think that you too, have fallen in love. It's like having jaundice, and seeing everything as [Coldplay] yellow.

The next step, of course, is not be consummated by that feeling that you feel within. It is time to listen and try and understand the language of her eyes. And it is not fun. Given the factor of complicacy and hypocrisy, you'll have a tough time. But then, you'll venture out only if you think the woman is worth it. So it is a litmus test.

Now some women like to be chased-- they think it is a measure of your "seriousness" towards her. It is a fallacious measure. For men can chase women harder and longer for their lust. Ahem, no pun intended really. Even women, can, for that matter.

Some women are two steps ahead of you :) while you're watching yourself bloom under the moons of her eyes, she is supplying you will all the shiny material for day-dreaming. She is only just waiting for you to go down on your knees.

Yes, sigh, that is indeed, mandatory. Women will never make you forget it if you didn't go down on your knees to ask that question.

Here's a quick checklist so far:

1. Don't judge or psycho-analyse her. Let her be.
2. Fight, but also make-up.
3. Be brutally honest, but also responsive towards the moments when she needs criticism or care.
4. If you understand that she also understands you and considers you special or important, then you may consider proposing her.

Don't ask her, "If I propose you then what will you do?"
I would hit him in the head. Apart from being a crime, it is also a major turn-off.

Guys need to be confident about the woman they want to propose. Confidence comes from knowing: that she also feels the same way. All the answers to your doubts lie in her eyes. Watch them.

Many times, women need to self-affirm their feelings for you, so they avoid looking in your eyes deliberately. Give her that space. Wait, but do not advertise or complain that you're waiting.

And then, take a step foward and risk all you have. Even if she accused you of misunderstanding and all that jazz, refer her this article. Else drop me a mail.

How to actually propose:

There are only two ways in which a woman really would like to be proposed: one is if you propose her in front of your family and close friends, and two, when you do it under the moon and stars with no one else but you and her.

Many women don't like a clandestine affair, or when you try to hide her from everyone you know. They like to know that people close to you are aware that she is a part of your life: that could just be a great compliment for her, if she really loves you.

And please, make that in person: no texts, no calls, no email, no video-conferencing.

No touching, no holding of hands, no kissing, before you propose.

Do it in your own style- in rain, snow, or pure sunshine.... in front of your parents, or rest of the world.... just mean it.

Coming up: Top 5 proposal episodes....

Obsession versus Love

If the object of your love told you that he is not in love with with you, what would you do?
You'd be devastated. Shattered. Sad. But here's what you'd do: you'd maintain grace, smile, wish the person all the best and move on. "Move on" could mean two things: one, is that you move on, and find another person to love; or you could "move on" with your life. May be you could only love that person and that person alone and you'd wish him the best. The road is tough.

This versus the scenario where the object of your obsession told you that he is not in love with you, what would you do?
You'd be devastated. Shattered. Sad. And here's what you'd do: you'd still keep calling, messaging, trying to meet that person. Even after repeated versions of the truth falling at your ears, you'd not be able to accept the "defeat". Yes, it would be a defeat to you. The center of your existence depends on that person's talking with you. Ownership. Possession.

I had a taste of the latter case recently, and for the first time in my life I was scared of myself. When the person held my hands (against my wish and visible uncomfort) I felt like screaming, and probably even hitting. The rage that formed within me was scary. I knew if I let myself go, I would turn the whole thing into one uglier mess, become a werewolf or something.

One of the saddest things in life is to apologise to someone for not loving him back. I believe everyone has the basic freedom to choose to like or love or to be with someone. And if you are a victim of an unrequited love, then may God be with you, you only have your love, your belief and your faith. You cannot - absolutely cannot - "tell" that person more than once that you love him. There's a sanctity in everything.

Dedicated to Jasmine -- Hope you will find your Prince very soon. Else, we can still spend an old ladies' evening together 50 years from now! :)

Bites and Bangalore

My dog, Daku, the centre of my world and of experimenting with video-making, has bit me twice in a span of 5 weeks. When his hair's cut, he looks like a rogue on the run, and with his soft, thick, golden mane, he looks more royal than a princess! :D My nanaji calls him a special dog, since he has five fingers (!!!) and my other close friend, Jasmine Desai, says that he has a look of wisdom on his face.

The second time he bit me, he did it with a sense of timing. He bit me at 2 AM in the night.... and the following day I had a flight to catch to Bangalore. And I had to do it before hitting my office. My flight was delayed by 20 mins and I still managed to miss it. I'd say the Jet Airways Manager did not like me and I'd also like to add that the manager was a female. [Later on, a friend of mine said that I should have tried talking to a male manager instead.] [Much later on, another friend of mine said that Jet Airways always did that.]

After 4 hours, I got another flight. The first thing I did after landing in Bangalore was to search for a doctor to give me an anti-Rabies shot. They say it has to be taken within 24 hours of the dog-bite. Luckily, I got a very sweet, old, doc in Kormangalam, who was mainly a kiddies' specialist. And that the reason why I waited to exclaim "F..." in pain, but the word never got out of my mouth. I was so surprised. But for the next shot, after a gap of 48 hours, I managed to find myself a homeopathy doc, who told me just before injecting, not to scream. I said don't make me. And immediately thereafter I exclaimed in pain, "F...".

Vantage Points

The vantage points of a life.

Was reading a book yesterday that inherently highlighted that destiny is the ultimate thing/ entity. If we win or lose, it is our destiny. If we did something bad in our lives, it was destiny that made us do it.

Last weekend, as me and my family stopped at a place to have some tea, I saw a very old woman sitting at the footsteps of the small restaurant, having the last of her biscuit dipped in tea. And there was no tea in her plastic cup. Yet, she was trying hard to have any drop of the tea cling to her remaining biscuit just to make it softer to chew. And there were stray dogs, encroaching on her breakfast.

We ordered breakfast and tea for her too. She wrapped the "breakfast" and may be it was saved for lunch.

Dad said that feeding the hungry and giving water to the thirsty, is the biggest dharma of all. He said that if God chose your body for a good deed you should be happy. And that made me wonder, if God could also choose my body for a bad deed. So all the mistakes and errors and bad experiences in my life were meant to be. A perspective could make me bitter; else I could just see how much I have learned.

But no matter what vantage point you are at, that look of innocence in your eyes, is always passing by as you pass every single day. Our faces and eyes keep getting darker. We think we are "maturing" and becoming "wiser".

Trusting cautiously may be an intelligent move, but it does something to you. Makes you scared a little and bitter somewhere within. Forgiveness doesn't come easy.

Very few faces retain that look of laughter, a look of innocence -- and to me, that is the most beautiful face.

A man will rise, a man will fall

On the sheer face of love

Like a fly on the Wall

- "The Fly"

A Bird

What a love it was

To see and survive

A life

One side

Wants to be understood -

-- graces and blessings of a love spotted and cherished

The other

Wants to be left alone -

-- the yearnings of disappearing and erasing the existence of memory

What a love it was

To fly and fall

This soul

Trenches of bones

Walking over the past and memories

Smiling as they come

A World of its Soul

Sometimes, when the fog lies unkissed by the light, it wonders if the world has a soul. A collective soul. Not collective conscious, thank you Mr. Durkheim. Like a person.